The issues are legion

There are too many sufferings in my life to list. Two things I would say are: Divorce and one remarriage ruined every holiday family gathering for me because parents or siblings pressured me to attend. I can't be in two places at the same time, and parents would be angry or saddened because they knew I was with their ex-spouse. Also visiting for a few hours and driving off to another household every holiday is exhausting for me and my family.

Another thing I would say is that step-siblings are not my siblings, and a stepmother is definitely of no relation to me, so don't demand a Mother's Day gift!

I wish my entire family would let me live in peace WITHOUT them. Divorce ends a family unit. When my parents got divorced, I should have also been released from my filial obligations.

The plus side of divorce? I wasn't sad when one parent died because it removed that holiday stress. When the next parent dies, I will be sad, but then I will finally get to enjoy holidays with my husband.

Comments for The issues are legion

Average Rating starstarstarstarstar

Click here to add your own comments

Aug 08, 2013
Rating
starstarstarstarstar
Amen!
by: Anonymous

Holidays were a horrid thing for me too! I completely agree! My mother divorced twice, so I felt all this pressure to see my dads family, my mother, and my step dads family too (because believe it or not, I feel closer to my step dad than either of my actual parents.)

Holidays are ruined; trying to visit everyone is stressful, tiresome, and down right emotionally exhausting. I always end up crying a lot, and my kids would be confused as to whose house we were at and what they were supposed to call all these people. Every single family member thinks they are entitled to have me drive to their home. No one comes to see me, however. And they all get mad if I go to another family members home! So you can't win for losing! Which is why I stopped going completely. They seem to have nothing but a hot dose of guilt to give me anyway.

Jul 20, 2013
Rating
starstarstarstar
Juggling stepfamily
by: Anonymous

My anonymous friend, I totally understand. Family gatherings get really awkward for me, too. I'm a Second Generation kid of a divorced family. My mom and my grandma are both divorced. Grandma's got two ex-husbands, one of whom has been remarried two other times, and I've got a stepmom to contend with. Overall it's just a huge mess. I tend to just ignore my dad and his wife, but I'm constantly feeling guilty about it, even though I know I'm being expected to juggle too many discordant relationships.

Jul 19, 2013
Rating
starstarstarstarstar
amen
by: Anonymous

"Divorce and one remarriage ruined every holiday family gathering..."

AMEN! They did for me too!

Click here to add your own comments

Join in and write your own page! It's easy to do. How? Simply click here to return to Kids' Divorce Stories.